Hiding from the inevitable.

Hiding from the inevitable. Hiding from the inevitable. I’ve discovered something.  Unfortunately it doesn’t predict the weather, nor does it cure anything.  It’s not a new app nor is it something that makes your life seemingly easier.  It’s not beautiful.  It’s not tasty.  It’s just a little annoying. I don’t have writer’s block.  I have more ideas than time and that’s part of the problem.  I’ve got blogger’s block.  I have photos taken and uploaded.  I have quasi-deadlines that are flying around my calendar.  I have the ideas, words, and analogies ready to go.  I just can’t sit down and get it done. I don’t know where to start.  My chest squeezes and I take another sip of my iced coffee.  Then I check Twitter and Facebook and I should probably check in on Instagram and Pinterest too.  I’m not procrastinating.  It’s my job after all.  My work is social media. Okay.  That’s enough now!  Yes, it’s your job, but you are putting off the inevitable.  Not the work, but getting over the fact that you have less hours in the day than you need. It is not because it’s too hard, or too long, or too boring though.  That’s the problem.  I love to write.  The words flow out.  The photos are a quick edit on the many useful and fun tools and apps that I have.  The links are a quick cut and paste.  The problem is that I can’t handle that my to do list and my I have time to do list do not match up.  That throws me into a panic.  The worst part of it all is that it’s sort of an imaginary problem.  Worrying about it solves nothing and eats up more time (as does writing this, but I’m hoping it’s part of the process). Solution?  I’m going to go to my list.  I’m going to check whatever I can check off and I am going to be satisfied.  That’s the hard part for me…being satisfied.  It’s a trait I’m teaching my children and I hate that! I need to find that sweet spot between working hard towards something and never seeming satisfied with anything.  Deep down I do have a lot of satisfaction in my life and work but, because I am always reaching for that next rung on the monkey bars, I’m not sure I ever have that satisfied “I made it across, flew through the air and dismounted and landed on my own two feet” and when I do…perhaps I’m the only one who notices. This week’s checks:

  • Worked at the farm.
  • Grocery Shopping (so I can cook again)
  • Coordinated part of the summer camp schedule
  • work meetings
  • The regular parenting stuff (homework, dance, lacrosse, yoga)
  • searched for a thrift store suit for an 8 year old girl playing Leonard Bernstein for biography days. Did not find one.
  • Blogging post done: 1 of …(okay I’m stopping here…not going to worry about how many I want to do.)
  • Freelance writing post done:  3 and starting 1 now.
  • Birthday parties scheduled.
  • Birthday party planning.
  • Library outings.
  • Finally put away my laundry.
  • Watering the plants.
  • Spraying the crabs.
  • Sewing 12 little dresses for the recital. (still a work in progress)

 

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